(Almost) every trade deadline trade, summed up in one sentence

1. Andre Drummond from the Pistons to the Cavs for a 2023 second-rounder and John Henson and Brandon Knight
 

Andre Drummond is pissed.
 

2. Marcus Morris and Isaiah Thomas to the Clippers; Jerome Robinson to the Wizards; Moe Harkless and a 2020 first-rounder to the Knicks
 

Thomas is going to be waived by the Clippers, which really, really, really sucks.
 

3. James Ennis from the 76ers to the Magic for a second-rounder
 

That’ll fix the 76ers.
 

4. Jordan McRae from the Wizards to the Nuggets for Shabazz Napier
 

You and we may know nothing about McRae, but he seems like a nice human.
 

5. D’Angelo Russell from the Warriors to the Timberwolves for Andrew Wiggins, other spare parts
 

The Wolves finally did something that would make Karl Anthony-Towns happy, and happy he is.
 

6. Justice Winslow, Dion Waiters and James Johnson from Miami to Memphis for Andre Iguodala, Solomon Hill and Jae Crowder
 

Fascinating trade, for sure, made even more fascinating by the fact that Miami extended Iguodala two years beyond this season, plus, Crowder has been traded for the fifth time since 2015, and, lastly, this run-on grammatical nightmare of a sentence exists only because our headline promised every summary would be in this format.
 

READ: The biggest winners and losers from the 2020 NBA trade deadline

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